Frustration, resistance, false starts, fear of ‘what if’, lack of faith in yourself, etc., I see it come in waves around everything from trying to develop a new habit, kicking an old one, a new beginning, bringing an idea to fruition, saying goodbye to toxic people, having a great day/week planned and BOOM! virus strikes, such ‘n such needs you to drop everything, etc.,
All of these things can and will, if you allow them, put you into self-doubt and fear. Which In turn, keeps you in the cycle of frustration and resistance.
How do you break the cycle?
Befriend the frustration & resistance, make fear your ally to extract that pearl of wisdom.
Yes, I am serious! Just like a child and adolescent will unconsciously choose negative behavior and poor choices to get your attention to fulfill a need, so too does your sub-conscious!When we get locked into a cycle, it is because our Spirit is trying to tell us something. Something that we aren’t listening to or have been so focused on a target that we have become disconnected. So it is going to get in your way until you pay attention to it. That something is a pearl of wisdom.
A pearl of wisdom is wisdom you gain about yourself by paying attention to your un-serving patterns, self-talk, frustrations, etc,.
Example: The weekend is coming and there is a project that you are really looking forward to tackling, your closet. Something that is very difficult to do during the week when there are several other things going on and this weekend you know the hubby is going on a ‘guys’ weekend. Bonus! Quiet time, extra reading time, extra long bath time-you get the picture. It sounds like pure heaven!
Thursday night rolls around and he comes home and hints that you are supposed to come because so-and-so’s wife might be coming and if you go too, then they can get the other wife to go, etc., -you feel pressured, almost down right bullied like if you don’t go, you are the worst person in the world.
Frustration. How could you say no? Also, how could you say yes? Is your time and what you were looking forward to really that important?
What do you do? Do you speak up for yourself and say no or do you succumb to living under the expectations of others and re-inviting the thought patterns and feeling of “My time isn’t important” in for a stay?If normally you would forego your time for you and your plans for the weekend and accompany your hubby on the trip then, you haven’t gained the pearl of wisdom. Furthermore, the “My time isn’t important” just became a squatter.
Now, if you would normally succumb to the expectations of others vs. what you truly want and this time you say: “No. Thanks for inviting me, but I am going to stay here and do what I had planned already.” -Ah!! Now there, you have begun to transform that un-serving pattern into a limitless one by standing up for yourself and honoring your time and your plans.
You Matter=Pearl of Wisdom found.
So schedule some sacred time to befriend the frustration, resistance & fear for inner communication, go to your undisturbed sacred space, find the silence within and listen. What is it that you need to know to break this cycle? Then, use your discernment to extract your lesson, or pearl of wisdom.
All that is left now is to unlock the door and step onto your path of fabulous!
What Fabulousness are you unlocking?
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Vatsala Shukla
I’m looking at the Raine Weber quote and thinking too many Yes’s not punctuated by a No is a recipe for being a doormat.
There are times when our saying Yes is important for the other person and it is a good Yes provided the other person reciprocates for us when it matters. If not, then never do anything you don’t want to.
Crystal Cockerham
Isn’t that a powerful statement? Yet, it is so true! Especially if a person is struggling to say no, it is easier for them to see from the other side of the table, so to speak, the Yes’s.
Barbara Parcells
Sometimes solitude is a welcome house guest! Time spent learning to listen to yourself is time well spent.
Crystal Cockerham
Yes! It is an investment. Especially when you feel you don’t have time, that is when it is vital to spend it. 🙂
Kathleen
“A pearl of wisdom is wisdom you gain about yourself by paying attention to your un-serving patterns, self-talk, frustrations, etc,.” What a great insight. So many of us just roll by the “bad habits” etc.. that lead to our unfulfillment! Love your blog!
Crystal Cockerham
Thank you Kathleen!
CK Kochis
This is a great reminder to follow our heart and do what feels good. It’s not always easy, but worth it. We are worth it! Thanks for sharing your insights and experiences, Crystal.
Crystal Cockerham
No it isn’t always easy to follow our hearts, but that is where our path to healing and growth are-our hearts have to challenge us to step outside our comfort zone. Thank you for commenting Cindy!